Coaching, in its modern format, has been around since the late 1990’s. People still think of it as something new, but in reality, Coaching has been around for millennia. There has never been a period in mankind’s history where Coaches did not exist.
Sure, it might have looked a little different, but Coaching is as old as the hills. Modern day Coaching may be more refined and a lot more commercially viable, but the principles remain the same.
WHAT DOES A COACH DO?
Coaches have the skills and knowledge to advise, support, and encourage their client.
They help them to:
A coach also has the ability to remain detached from the issues at hand.
Consider the wise words of Albert Einstein:
“We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them”
TIME IS MONEY
In the modern era, in life and business, time is money. There’s an ever-increasing amount of cooperation and collaboration going on both in businesses and in peoples’ private lives. We need to figure things out almost on the fly these days while dealing with different time zones and cultures.
Everyone has their own unique issues to handle alongside everything else that needs to be accommodated, and then there’s the technology we all use to connect with everybody and everything.
Life is definitely more complex today and it certainly seems to be speeding up every time you turn around. It doesn’t take long before we begin to have thoughts of overwhelm and burnout on our minds.
The question we need to ask ourselves is this: “How long can I justify spending time and money on this issue trying to figure it out for myself, knowing what Albert Einstein said about problem solving?”
If having a Coach could save you time and money, it would be ridiculous NOT to hire one, wouldn’t it?
Throughout history, every King has had an Advisor (Coach) in every culture. Every military leader has had a Strategist (Coach), every World Class Athlete has had a trainer (Coach), and every Entertainer has had a Manager (Coach).
WHO HIRES A COACH?
The only conclusion we can draw from the history of Coaching is that the people who hire a Coach fall into two camps:
Many people will say that they want to change themselves, their life, their job, or their circumstances, but in real terms, they are fearful of change. They delay, procrastinate, and make excuses. They lack self-confidence and the drive to follow through. It’s human nature. It’s what ordinary people always do.
PEOPLE WHO HIRE A COACH ARE NOT ORDINARY PEOPLE
They are inspired and have vision. They embrace change and are prepared to get fully engaged in making positive changes in their life. Plus, they don’t want it to take forever!
They have a sense of urgency, and they want someone they can lean on, confide in, use as a sounding board, and rely on to help them make the inevitable tough decisions that they can see on the horizon.
People hiring their first Coach are often racked with pessimism. They think, “What if I waste my money?”
Consider that, before you hire a coach, you’re already wasting time, which is the same as money, and you lack the resources to resolve the issues at hand. It would cost you less to hire a Coach and find out first-hand and NOW how unbelievably useful a Coach can be.
People who are hiring their second or subsequent Coach have no pessimism. What they are looking for is the perfect fit for them and the circumstances they find themselves in.
Within reason, money is not the issue and they never think about the possibility of wasting it. Their main concern is finding the RIGHT Coach and then hoping that the Coach they choose has a spot left open where they can be accommodated, and can they start today?
IS HIRING A COACH RIGHT FOR YOU?
Maybe. Maybe not.
If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, perhaps a coach can get you moving in the right direction to help you create the life you desire - and sooner rather than later.
Trust…what is trust? Merriam-Webster defines it as “assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or trust of someone or something”. What do you do when the trust you had has been violated? There are a range of emotions you may experience from anger to sadness to helplessness. You begin to question what could you have done to prevent this or even why did this happen to me. You want revenge. You want the other person to suffer and feel what you feel as a result of the betrayal. It’s during this moment that you have to make the decision to let this hinder and derail you or propel you to process it and rise up as a leader.
I have experienced this most recently in which my trust was violated in my own home. The moment I realized what had taken place, it was like a gut punch that took my breath away. I could not believe it and I could feel the anger and rage and then the tears welling up in my eyes. I began to cry and wail, not wanting to believe that someone who I trusted and allowed to be in my home and with my family could steal from me. In my emotional state, I could have made the decision to make this person’s life miserable and seek the revenge I so desperately wanted. Instead I chose to work through my emotions and allowed things to play out that in the end worked out in my favor.
But betrayal does not just happen in our personal lives, they can happen in our professional lives too. When that happens, how do you handle it? What feelings and emotions do you experience? Do you process it the same as a personal betrayal?
Consider this scenario. You and your manager have a very good working relationship. She looks to you for your leadership and gives you additional responsibilities when possible. You trust her and she trusts you. Let’s say you informally worked on a process that could make your department run more efficiently. After weeks of preparation, you are now ready to present it to your manager. Excited that this project may be the catalyst that gives you the recognition you are seeking, you enter the meeting with a positive outlook. You present the project to your manager and she loves it. She wants to present it to upper management for approval and asks that you be there. The day comes and you are prepared for the presentation but to your surprise your manager is now presenting it as her own idea.
What is going through your mind at that moment? How could she? I thought she would have given me the recognition and credit that I so rightly deserved!! Did she really do what I think she did?? And so much more…
What do you do now? Do you confront her or let your anger fester? Do you vow to never share anything with her again for fear that she will claim it as her own? This is where you show those leadership skills and decide to have a conversation with your manager. It is your opportunity to express your feelings in such a way that she receives and understand how you feel. There are three points to remember:
Leadership is not a place but an action. As John Maxwell says, “As a leader, the first person I need to lead is me. The first person that I should try to change is me.”. It starts with you!
With over 15 years of leadership experience in various organizations and professionally, Coach "T" has been sought out all over the country for her leadership expertise. And through her own life experiences, she applies them to her life coaching strategies and techniques. Coach "T" is authentic and encouraging, yet thought provoking.